Hello! This is Sophie, I haven't posted in a while so i wanted to write something quick and to the point about how I've been feeling lately and what my life's been like.
I went to see my brothers band concert about 3 days ago. Just for future reference, there is no better way to get punched in the face by all of your past mistakes than to sit alone with your mom in the corner of the gymnasium watching your old band play. I couldn't help but think about all the people i hurt, and how lost i really was. I was struggling with my sexuality at the time, and there was a girl who liked me who i loved with all my heart because she was (is) an incredible human being. But because i was so selfishly caught up with impressing strangers, I couldn't see what was really important.(and that was her). Right now im just really really tiered of being me. And even though I'v changed a lot for the better I still distance myself a bit and struggle to show my true feelings. By writing this journal I hope to challenge this, and prove that i can function as an only semi-hopeless human being. (and be brave and show my feelings yay) I wanted to let yall know that I'm now pansexual and I usually love to hug people. And though physical contact still frightens me a bit, I'm getting over it day by day. I'm also trying not to 'ignore' messages just because I feel like i have nothing to say, and that sometimes being an idiot is better than avoidance. So yeah for all the people who had to deal with me, ever, and more importantly in middleschool, I wanted to say thank you. And though It would take forever to address every single one of you, I care about you all. New interests of mine have been marina and the diamonds, various metal bands (system of a down, pierce the veil ect), makeup, some dubstep
and my most recent favorite book of all time has been frankenstein! So yeah uh I'll be checking da frequently to talk to yall if you want to talk to me and yeah! (i also don't get pissed off as easily about stupid things anymore thank god ah)